Vachon Imagined

When someone truly listens to you, they are in the state of awareness itself. There is no questioning, no resistance—just a simple act of surrender that says, I am here and nowhere else.

Now, here is where things get really cool and go against much of what we expect.

When people are truly listening to you, they are not agreeing with you or combating you. None of that happens in the state of total presence. They are simply listening.

Which means you can be angry. You can express your thoughts. You can talk until you turn blue in the face—and God bless the person who has developed the patience and surrender for that—but here is the thing:

When true listening happens, they are not validating your experience. They are present for it.

And there is a huge difference.

I think what the world craves is a love that agrees with you, or tells you, Oh, I’m so sorry that happened to you. Or, Absolutely. I agree with you. Now let’s go do something about it.

But that is not necessarily listening.

That is entering your experience with you and then validating what they see, feel, or understand.

That is not the same thing.

True listening has no judgment. Nor is it even a place for you to place your burdens, because there is no self here to contain them or heal them. We simply do not have that kind of power as human beings.

But what we do have is the power to listen.

And when listening is done presently, patiently, and wisely, you know it.

The other person knows it, too. Even when they want you to get up and argue with them, they know it, too.

It’s just that often, when true listening shows up, it makes people uncomfortable because they expect validation, criticism, or a yes, I see you.

But true listening has nothing to do with any of that.

It does not agree with you. It does not disagree with you. It does not take your side or take theirs.

It simply remains present and doesn’t abandon you for something greater.